What to bring to assisted living: a room-by-room checklist

When a family first calls me, the question underneath almost every other question is the same: what on earth do we bring? A whole house, sometimes decades of it, has to fit into one or two rooms. It can feel impossible. It isn’t, but it does help to have a plan.

This is the checklist I use. Treat it as a starting point and adjust it for the person you love. Their habits, their favorite things and the way they actually spend their day matter more than any list.

First, ask the community these questions

Before anything is packed, get a floor plan with measurements and a few answers from the community. It saves a lot of heartache on moving day.

• What furniture is provided, and can it be removed if you bring your own?
• Are there rules about rugs, extension cords, candles, space heaters or nails in the walls?
• Is there a kitchenette? A refrigerator? A microwave?
• Where are the outlets, the cable jack and the windows?
• Is there any storage, and how large is the closet?
• What day and time can movers use the elevator or loading area?

The bedroom

• Their own bed, or at least their own mattress topper, pillows and bedding. Familiar sleep matters enormously in the first weeks.
• A nightstand with a drawer, and a lamp they can switch on without getting up.
• A favorite quilt or throw.
• A small dresser if the closet is limited.
• A night light, or a lamp with a soft bulb, to light the path to the bathroom.

The sitting area

• The chair they always sit in. If it’s too large, choose the one they love most, not the one that matches.
• A small side table for a cup of tea, glasses and the remote.
• A reading lamp with a warm, bright bulb.
• A small table and two chairs, if there’s room, so a visitor can sit and share a meal or a game of cards.

The walls

Walls are where a room becomes theirs. Bring more framed photos than you think, then choose the best for a gallery wall. Include a piece of art they’ve lived with for years, a clock with large numbers and a calendar or whiteboard for visits and appointments.

Clothing and everyday things

• About two weeks of clothing for the current season. Store the rest with family and rotate.
• Comfortable, non-slip shoes and slippers.
• Toiletries, a hair dryer and a small mirror.
• Labels on clothing and glasses cases, if the community launders for residents.

The little things that make it home

This is the part families most often forget, and it’s the part that matters most. For my grandmother Roslyn, it was three small ceramic pigs on her windowsill. Ask: what would they reach for on a hard day? A favorite mug, a radio, a plant, a box of letters, a familiar scent, a cookbook they’ll never cook from again but love to hold. Bring those.

Safety, without making it feel clinical

Through my aging-in-place training (CAPS I), I’ve learned that small choices make a room safer without making it feel like a hospital:

• Keep a clear walking path at least 36 inches wide from bed to bathroom to door.
• Skip loose throw rugs, or choose one large, low-pile rug that’s taped or gripped securely.
• Choose chairs with arms and a firm seat that’s easy to rise from.
• Put lamps on both sides of the room, and make every switch easy to reach.
• Store everyday items between hip and shoulder height.

What to leave behind

Large sets of dishes, most of the books, formal furniture, duplicates of almost everything, and anything kept out of obligation rather than love. Letting go is hard, and it’s okay if it takes more than one pass. I’ve written about that in how to help a parent decide what comes along.

If you’d like this as a printable list you can tick off, download my free move-in checklist.